Arais Abhaile
Rory's tips for a good snowboarding holiday
Get your leg tattooed the day before you leave. This will leave you itchy all week, but give the locals something to stare at
Get a pair of boots even bigger then the ones you usually wear
Get your board, the more awkward to carry the better
Get your overly priced ski lift pass, then use it as little as possible
Buy a crash helmet, not for snowboarding, but to save you from the huge lumps of ice dropping from the roof tops
Don't speak a word of Johnny Foreigner
Act surprised when you find no Irish staff working in the Burgerking
Get rope burns from trying to get up the baby slope
Get all the fun of the fair on the ski lift, and jump, crash and burn as you try and make a civilised landing
Concentrate on speed, speed, speed going down the slope, control including turning and stopping will come with time
Complain that you can't get the three basic food groups, Coca-Cola, Taytos and Chocolate
Discover the delights of Johnny Foreign culinary skills as food poisoning hits various members of your group
Drive skidoos like you're James Bond
Create your own blizzard by dropping to your arse and sliding for a hundred yards when you try and stop
Watch the Teletubbies in Spanish
Constantly quote Blackadder, Monty Python, Eddie Izzard, Billy Connolly and The Simpsons